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Between holiday shopping, entertaining, and the annual company party, ‘tis the season that makes even an extrovert want to curl up under the covers for some time alone. One of my clients, an Alex Baldwin look alike, recently confided that he hates going to these holiday events. So, over the years, he’s developed what he calls his survival strategy, which is simply this: He makes sure to take along his wife, a social butterfly who flutters immediately to the center of the room and begins chatting with everyone. He leaves her there to schmooze, while he goes and gets them both drinks. Once her libation is delivered, he heads straight back to the bar where he can be found for the remainder of the evening hugging the countertop and trying to avoid making eye contract with anyone.

Believe me, I know just how uncomfortable schmoozing can be at these events. The setting seems so contrived and the mingling feels forced. But before you go into hibernation or borrow my client’s dubious coping technique, read on. Company holiday parties can provide the ideal opportunity to meet and greet your colleagues and clients, along with their significant others. And thankfully, there are things you can do to make networking more bearable. While you may never grow to love these seasonal events, with a little bit of preparation and a few tricks up your sleeve, you can finally stop dreading them.

Here are some tips on how to get more out of this year’s party than a watered down gin and tonic or a few cheese puffs:

PLAN SMALL–TALK TOPICS
Before the event, come up with five general and five gender-specific small talk topics such as sports, family, travel, movies, traffic, or even the weather. Also have a few work topics ready that specifically relate to your industry or firm.

BE YOUR BEST SELF
Before you arrive, think of a few words or phrases that describe the image you would most like to project, such as outgoing, relaxed, interested, or friendly. Then develop inner monologues and prompts to help you remember this best self that you want to project. If you feel yourself slipping out of your best-self zone at the party, pull these phrases up and repeat them silently to manage your anxiety or fear. Depending on your goals, the phrase might be, or “I’m so happy to talk with you,” or “Tell me more,” or “Own the room.”

LIKE THE SCOUTS, BE PREPARED
Thankfully, you can anticipate the typical questions you’ll be asked at a company event—queries about your title or role, how long you’ve been with the firm, where you’ve worked in the past. Practice your answers ahead of time. But instead of preparing an excruciating laundry list of “I used to do that and then I did something else and now I do this,” take a few memorable gems of information about you and your accomplishments and weave them into a story. Include your personality, your humor, and perhaps even a bit of self-deprecation. For example, you might express amazement at how you arrived where you are, like the television host who begins with, "I watched TV all the time as a kid, but I never thought I would actually be on it!” Learning to create what I call a bragologue is key to this approach. For help developing your own bragologue, use my Take-12 questionnaire at www.peggyklaus.com/brag/questionnaire.htm.

MAKE NEW FRIENDS
At the party, treat each person you talk with as a potential new friend. Ask them questions: Do they have kids? Where did they grow up? What hobbies or causes are they particularly interested in? Knowing details like these will provide a number of entry points for connecting with colleagues who can help further your career ambitions. Listen carefully to their responses, then ask additional questions or dovetail your comments off a point someone else makes. “Act as if” you are interested, even if you aren’t. The more engaged you become, the more engaging you will seem to others.

FAKE IT ‘TILL YOU MAKE IT
What about when you’re cranky, tired, sick, or didn’t get that holiday bonus you were counting on? How do you pump yourself up for attending the company party when it’s the last thing you want to do? The secret is to think like an athlete. I’m betting that even major league baseball players don’t want to be at every game of the season. But they adopt a mindset that says, “I’m here and I can’t wait to do this!” Next time you don’t feel like showing up, start thinking that way. On the way to the event—assuming you are alone in a car—try saying the following words out loud: “I’m so excited to be going! I can’t wait to talk with everyone there!” By the time you arrive, you’ll be ready to go.

SET GOALS
Set goals for yourself at the event, and then push yourself to accomplish them. For example, you could set the goal of initiating conversations with at least five new individuals.

DON’T CHECK YOUR PERSONALITY AT THE DOOR
Okay, it’s a work event. Therefore, you should be on your best behavior and not act like it’s poker night with the boys. However, this doesn’t mean you have to leave your personality at the door or spend the night in office mode. Use entertaining stories and appropriate humor. Be conversational.

USE THE MAGIC WORD: THANKS
Before you leave, take the time to thank senior management or other hosts for throwing the party. And be sure to thank their assistants, too—they’re probably the ones who really made it all come together.

REMEMBER, IT’S JUST A PARTY
Come with a relaxed attitude and ready to have a good time!